A Miracle

Sitting in the emergency room,
listening to the sounds of agony,
the dreariness of the night rolls on,
as the people began to filter in,
there became a sound of overwhelming distress,
as if one had lost someone so dear to them,
thinking what if that were me they were crying over,
but thanking God has always been number one,
There is no one that can teach you about life but God,
Sitting here in my hospital bed,
knowing how blessed I truly am,
For I have mad it out of the worse car accident,
that man had ever seen a pregnant woman,
make it out of...
Still in tact.

A guilty conscience...

I thought my life was simple.
It was a little more complex than I thought.
My mind tends to contemplate on my past...
Why did it have to be me?
Why was I the one chosen to endure so much misery?
I thought about a lot of reasons...
but there are none to justify what happened...
So here I am...
Getting over it all...
It took some time for me to get over it...
It took me years to forgive the man whom molested me...
I couldn't forgive him while he was alive though...
I didn't kill him...
His conscience did.

Free yourself from guilt

What people decide to do with their life after something tragic happens to them.
There are many ways one can look at situations as...it does not necessarily have to be bad.
I took my many tragedies and turned them all into who I am today.
I was raped.
I was molested...more than once.
I was emotionally abused.
I was mentally abused.
I was physically abused.
But I got over it.
I became stronger.
I endured the agony for so long.
I grew tired of tears being my comfort.
I grew tired of eating chocolate cakes every time I needed a friend.
There is nothing wrong with crying.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to belong.
But one must learn to accept themselves first.
Accept the fact that this did happen to me,
But it wasn't my fault.
It wasn't my fault.
I was just an infant.
I was just a toddler.
I was just a pregnant girlfriend.
I was just a person that they felt they could demolish,
But no one can make me feel inferior anymore.
I am stronger.
I am wiser.
I know what they did to me was wrong.
I am here now.
Where I belong.

childhood misery

Growing up in the foster care system was tough for me but it was something that made me who I am today. There were times when I didn' t know where I'd end up. There were times when I'd cry myself to sleep from all the abuse that I have endured. But I got over it. I got over the tears, night after night. There was more dreariness in my life than there was bliss. I didn't know how to handle it. All I knew was agony. There was nothing euphoric about my childhood...